Soul Vibrations-My Intro to Meditation

Tonight our lecture was focused on meditation and hosted by a beautiful being, Yoga Dave. Meditation is a fairly new practice for me, that I didn't think I knew much about or how to get to that 'point'. However, meditation can be found in anything you do-breathing, washing dishes, dancing, listening to music, dreaming, walking, swimming, kissing, prayer, surfing, hiking, staring at the ocean, into the fire, up at the clouds...or sitting on your sit bones with your legs crossed and your palms facing up or down. You can even lie down and do it. Pretty much you can meditate many different ways, but make sure that posture is in check and you are comfortable where you are because you want to be free of pain so that your body can focus on just being. Before this class I thought you had to take special classes to know how to meditate, that you needed specific tools to reach this certain feeling of 'enlightenment'. I come to find out all you need is your breath, an open mind, and an effort to silence those scurrying thoughts. However if your mind wanders than that's alright! Just come back into stillness when allowed. Meditation is different for everyone but I feel the main focus is to escape the busy, stimulating, advertising driven, stress-filled, traffic jam of an outside world and find the inner world that resides well, inside of you. A world of peace, silence, love, compassion. A connection between the mind (that crazy spinning, super intelligent, complex mind of ours) and our heart. Be ZEN. Which means the act of nothingness, the most direct experience to reality, to not label anything and have no pre-conceived notions of what things already are. For each breath in and out create a new experience. Things are moving so fast in this world. So fast. How do we escape the craziness? What do we do so that we are not engulfed by this 'society' and we don't go insane? Ideally camping trips, hiking adventures, nature getaways is where I need to go for a few days here and there, but since my life is so busy at the moment then I need a more constant practice so that I may stay grounded and light. Through meditation I hope to achieve a constant flow of beautiful and positive energy that allows me to navigate freely into the world. Fear of uncertainties arise but nothing in this life is guaranteed. We are our own destiny. As I prepared for my meditation tonight, legs crossed, sit bones grounded into my block, hands cupped in my lap forming a little window with my thumbs, eyes closed, Ujjayi breath in...out, forming that oceanic sound-I heard people chattering outside, the room was hot, sweat dripping down my face, neck, chest, I focused on counting to ten first breath in 1, first breath out 1 and did so until I reached 10. If I lost my count I went back to 1 As I let the thoughts run away from my mind swirls of caramels and blacks rippled in their place. I was thinking nothing, just focused on my breath...then a huge whirling sucking sound appeared...ahhh what is THIS?? It was a vaccuum, they were cleaning outside. 1, 1, 2, 2, 3, 3, 4, 4...I dove right back into my focus. I like this, this sanctuary of nothingness. Dave said a beautiful thing about becoming a yoga teacher in that we have the opportunity to change many peoples lives by sharing the knowledge of what we learn and passing it on and within each of us we hold the power to do so...share the positive vibrations each and every day. Namaste.

Inhale...Exhale

Second week of teacher training has gone by and I have been learning an abundance of information about yoga....and myself. It's really a beautiful thing to be with a group of people that are so open with everything in their lives. It's helping myself, and everyone I believe to grow our trees :) Recently I feel like I've been experiencing somewhat of a quarter life crisis, since it is nearing that time coming this November 5th. Twenty-five. Whew. I've been stressed-which is a word uncommonly used in my vocabulary, exhausted, and I feel that my judgement has been clouded. So, I take this as life telling me that some changes need to be made, even though there is a lot of transition going on in my life, there are personal endeavors that need to erupt. Clearing my mind and making room for the new memories, the present moment, detaching myself from past people, situations that I know in my heart no matter what they have done, I need to have love in my mind and in my heart for. Love for all beings. Because love takes positive energy, an energy that doesn't drain the body of essential life. Anger, resentment, and regrets suck so much out without replenishing vital nutrients, and the only person I am hurting is myself. This also brings me to another elmination-sugar. Sugar is a friend of mine and it doesn't allow me to just have one zing, it makes sure and creates itself into all kinds of different personas so that I latch on to it like a needy companion. One day I might have a nice, simple, balanced relationship with this 'friend' but for now, during these next 9 weeks of teacher training, I have decided to say goodbye so that my mind can be clear of clouds and filled with light. Fruits are still going to be included, but refined sugar found in those delectable dark chocolate coated everything sold at Trader Joe's-adios. A new place to call home has also presented itself at a classical moment. I am moving in with a fellow yogi at the end of this week in a precious place nestled in one of the oldest neighborhoods in San Diego. There is a pecan tree in the backyard and the leaves on the ground remind me of back home in the Midwest. There's actually trees which is a nice amenity in San Diego seeing as the greenery here is sparse AND a glorious old antique stove. There's just something about vintage anything that brings me joy-it's a trip to the honored past. I am delighted for this new venture, with a new spirit. There are some other life alterations to be made within the near future, so I'm wishing and putting out in the universe that these happen, at the right time of course :) We were asked in lecture, 'What is Yoga?' Yoga is the place where I go to seek and find balance, to see into myself, to ground myself to the earth through all four corners of my feet, to go deep into my core and find that internal heat that radiates throughout every inch of my body, to OPEN MY HEART and shine it brightly to the universe...Yoga is my happy place. A plethora of information is being discussed and demonstrated in class and I am trying to absorb what I can. It still hasn't resonated that I am doing all of this to become a teacher. My instructor keeps telling us, 'There is a teacher inside of all of you'. This is the truth. Teacher inside of me, come out, come out wherever you are...

My Yoga Quest into Teacher Training

On my way to being a teacher? Wow, this is going to be a big obstacle for me! On our first day of yoga we were asked to get up in front of the class and talk about ourselves, why we loved yoga, what obstacle we hope to overcome...I figured this little presentation would come easy to me seeing as I have a history of customer service jobs therefor I am always conversing with people. As it approached my turn to make my way in front of the mirror to present to the half circle of 12 or so students sitting in our super nifty posture chairs (which I am so buying-they are wonderful!) my heart started to race and I literally thought it was going to leap out of my chest. 'Kristin, are you ready?' 'Oh, no way,' I thought to myself. As I faced everyone I said my name which I'm surprised I didn't forget seeing as I was shaking like a tiny Chiuaua, why I loved yoga, which I think I said the word balance numerous times, and then my obstacle, which I remembered and said that it was commitment. I am infamously known for this lovely trait and have a hard time fully committing to something. If things start to get a little hard, or demand too much from me then I usually opt for the easy way out and run away from it because sometimes it's easier to dream of something else and not give my whole heart to one thing. Now this isn't to be confused with things that I actually need to separate myself away from or things that I know pretty quickly just aren't for me, because situations arise like that also that I know in order to keep my focus and way of life I need to remove myself from the situation. But for me, this yoga teacher training is a HUGE commitment. One that I am very excited and a little scared of. I may talk to people all day but to actually TEACH, to actually have students come to my class because they enjoy what I have to offer, because they want to share the energy I put off and they want to learn from ME, this is a big, scary, amazing, aspiring role I want to become. We are all here on this earth to teach one another something. To share what we know. I know I am here to share happy, healthy energy with the people around me and yoga is essential in every one's lives who aspire to know their true selves, their higher being, their center. This whole thing kind of fell into my lap and I am going with it. I remember always admiring yoga teachers and admiring yoga and all it's meaning and always told myself that I wanted to get into this world, this happy, meaningful world, but for some reason didn't think it possible. My friend gave me a free weeks pass and I went every day that week, sometimes even 2x in one day because I loved how it made me feel so much. Yoga is my time, shared with others who are all there for different reasons. I am there because my practice is my happy place, it is my place where I can look myself into the eyes in the mirror deeply and know that I love who I am looking at and looking through (because sometimes it gets that intense) and I love this life that is given to me and this crazy outside world is but a place where I am an inhabitant of, but my life, it's mine...to do whatever I want with, to share with everyone, to open my heart, and to show compassion whenever and wherever I go. Yoga keeps me grounded to the earth and all it's beautiful perplexity. This is just the beginning of a very memorable journey and without a doubt KNOW that my life is going to change within these next 9 weeks, so I say to you change with an open heart and an open mind, 'Welcome' :)