The Great Wonder Wall

I haven't been posting for this latter part of my Yoga Journey, mostly because I hit a wall. A TALL, THICK, unbreakable (it seemed) wall. I rebelled against one of the things I love most, YOGA. This 'block' was big and stagnant and wouldn't budge. My mind started wandering to every other possibility I want to pursue, every place I dream of inhabiting, instead of focusing on the one thing I wanted most- to become a teacher. Wandering, dreaming mind...forever mysterious and playing around with the beautiful temptations that cross it. I stopped going to yoga all together for a week. It was my rebellion stage. I'm not really sure where it came from but it came from behind the corner and hid me from my passion. Hide and seek no more, I am determined to make it through this, even if it takes me longer than the 9 weeks. My teacher and mentor Melissa has been so wonderful and keeps telling me to see my light, that I have such a bright, blinding light. All of us do. I feel I do, but for some reason it is covered by a shade of gray in my heart. I'm trying to paint it with colors so that it vibrantly shines it's beauty, boldness, and grace. This past weekend was one of true wonder and kinetic energy. Full of birthday celebration, new friends, passion filled music, and my wonderful, beautiful mother came out to celebrate! Seeing her, let so much stress and pent up emotion pour out of me. There is something about family that cannot compare to anything else. Her being here made me feel secure and fearless. It was lovely. We had class outside on a grassy noll overlooking the ocean. I was at home in my element, as I could feel the energy flood the space around me as I instructed my admirable classmates into my very favorite of all poses-DANCERS :) Feeling the oceanic wind, smelling the salty air, gazing out into the horizon knowing there is a whole other world on the other side...so far, yet reachable, staring up at the clouds and being supported and loved by the vast universe that surrounds us as we lie on our mats in our final Savasana. Ahhh, this is magic. As if my magic mat could take me anywhere I wanted to be at that moment, but I was exactly where I wanted and needed to be. The next day of class we spent at one of my favorite places, Swami's. I threw my mat to the side and felt the sand between my toes. I drew a heart deep into the sand marking my space...closed my eyes and set my intention...to focus on the balance, the love, the gifts that come from every moment I breathe. Every practice different than the next. New day, new practice. Something positive and powerful is in the air and I have realized that this 'block' was only an illusion, just waiting to be broken down. I can do this, I will do this. This teacher training is the birth of something bigger than I can imagine. I am reaching deep inside the unknown and pulling out new surprises every time. I am so grateful for the amazing friends that I have made on this journey. My fellow yogis are beautiful, sensational, strong, teachers that I have, and continue to learn so much from. This is just the beginning for us. Wherever we are in life, see it. Recognize it. Accept it. Know that the blocks that bind us and try and stop us from pursuing our passions are not real, but ghostly images of reflections that we so easily can step through with ease and grace.
Love, Light, & Peace
-K